Fabulous Saturday

What a lovely day we had yesterday. It had all the fabulous features a Saturday should have: a sweaty yoga class, a little grocery shopping, a run, some down time, dinner with friends and of course, good food. It all started with a bowl of Trader Joe’s High Fiber cereal mixed with Quaker Oat Squares. I topped it off with ground flax seed and dried blueberries. I’ve almost polished off my Costco size bag of dried blueberries and I can’t wait to dip into the mixed dried berries next!

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After breakfast and blogging, I went to my yoga class with Doroda. Unlike last time she taught the class, this class was full of sun salutations, vinyasas, challenging poses and sweat. We never made it into shoulder stand but we did give wheel another try. This time we used blocks up against a wall and I actually made it up for a few seconds! I have faith that with more practice, I will be up into it in a few weeks.

Yoga was followed by a quick trip to the grocery store to pick up the ingredients for my entry into this weeks BSI contest. I was oh so excited to make my entry, I started on it as soon as I crossed the threshold of home. I made a spinach and crab quiche that I am going to call crabcake quiche because that is exactly what it tasted like.

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Crabcake Quiche

9 inch whole wheat frozen pie crust

3 eggs, divided

1/2 cup mayonnaise

2 tbsp white wheat flour

1/2 cup milk

1/2 cup Parmesan cheese, grated

2.5 oz pepper jack cheese, shredded

3 dashes nutmeg

1/2 cup green onions, chopped

1 cup fresh spinach, chopped

8 oz jumbo lump crabmeat, cooked and picked over for shells

salt and pepper to taste

Instructions:

Preheat oven to 350*. Lightly beat one egg white and brush the pie crust with it. In a large bowl, beat the remaining eggs,  leftover egg white and leftover yolk.  Add in the milk, mayonnaise, flour, nutmeg, salt and pepper and beat until smooth. Add in remaining ingredients except crab and mix well. Finally, add in the crab being careful not to break it up too much. Pour into the prepared pie shell and bake for 45 minutes until it is slightly golden brown and the middle is set.  Serve warm, room temp or cold for breakfast lunch or dinner.

Let me tell you people, this thing was so good. So good in fact that I felt like I could eat the whole thing and savory dishes rarely make me feel that way 😉 I had my slice with a little pile of rooster sauce to give it some serious heat

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and to keep from eating the whole thing, I had some carrot sticks and almond butter.

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Then for lunch dessert, I had three chocolate covered almonds.

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Once we ate lunch, we watched some of the DVR and then headed out for a run in the beautiful sunshine. It went much better than the last time I attempted running outdoors. The weather was much warmer so my lungs did not hurt as much but the hills still proved to be a big challenge. The dear husband was patient and walked with me each time I need to take a walk break. When all was said and done, we covered two miles and it felt good to be in the great outdoors. For an after run snack, I had a small bowl of greek yogurt topped with peaches and creamed honey. If you have never had creamed honey, my suggestion would to be to stop reading this and go buy some NOW.  Well, you can wait until you have finished reading but really, you should get some ASAP 😀 As the name suggests, it is much creamier than regular honey and it leaves my mouth really happy.

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Once we were done with snack time and showers, we headed out to Costco to purchase a few items and then headed to dinner at our friends, Sarah and FJ’s, house. Sarah had prepared quite the spread. We started out with mozzarella wrapped in roasted vegetables and perfectly salty black olives.

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For the main course, we started with warm yeast rolls topped with rosemary and sea salt

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followed by lasagna rolls with pine nuts

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white beans with caramelized onions and walnuts

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and THE BEST spinach I have ever eaten. In the spinach was basil, garlic and red pepper. I had never thought to add basil to fresh cooked spinach but I will from here on out.

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All of the food was fantastic, my friend Sarah likes to spend crazy amounts of hours in the kitchen and her passion for cooking really shines in everything she makes. For dessert, she made poached pears topped with vanilla ice cream and candied pecans. This was my first time having poached pears and I must say, I really liked them. I was nervous that they would taste like the red wine they were poached in but to my delight, they didn’t. They were perfectly sweet with a hint of spice from the cinnamon and nutmeg. yum!

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I can’t wait until we are invited over again 🙂

Question: What is your idea of the perfect way to spend a day?

Bad Thai Food?

As you may already know from yesterday’s post, I wasn’t feeling great and I missed yoga 😦 I didn’t wake up until 8:35! I guess I just need the rest since I am sick and had a stressful week. I started the day with half a moral fiber bran muffin from Trader Joe’s topped off with a little almond butter. Eh…It was ok, I am pretty sure it was the first bran muffin I have ever had.

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On the side, I had this little orange for a vitamin C kick.

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We didn’t really do much because we were both sick and not feeling up to much. We filed our taxes (boo!!) and then made some lunch. I made Amy’s texas veggie burger on whole wheat english muffins with cheese, pickles, ketchup and mustard. The dear husband thought they tasted like “real” burgers.

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On the side, we had spicy blue corn chip and guacamole from Whole Foods. yum!

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I still felt a little hungry so I had a small bowl of greek yogurt topped with lemon sauce.

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After the yogurt, we hit the road to pick up more tissues and a prescription. We decided to give the new local Thai place a try to see if it would open up our sinuses. We typically have to drive about 30 minutes for Thai Food so we had high hopes because this place was only 10 minutes away. We started with jasmine tea

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and summer rolls. The tea was tasty but the summer rolls were very bland. This was our first clue.

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Next up was bang bang shrimp. The last time we had bang bang shrimp it was at The Bone Fish grill and it was spectacular. Maybe our standards were too high but this time it really sucked. It was very grainy and reminded us both of dirt. The shrimp tasted like the kind you buy in the freezer section at the supermarket, I only ate two of them.

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At this point, we weren’t even excited about our entrees. I ordered my favorite, Drunken Noodles, which I always order  when we go for Thai. Besides being so hot I could hardly eat it, it was flavorless. The dear husband thought his Pad Thai was pretty flavorless as well. We both only took a couple of bites before calling it quits. Thank goodness we had a coupon!

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Once we were home, I had a small piece of leftover brownies. I can’t decide if I like these things better warm or at room temp. Whoever wins these babies in Meghann’s Bake Sale is going to be very pleased.

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Tell me about your worst “Bad Food” restaurant experience.

Best Fudge Brownies

Hello Bloggies!

I’m posting a little late today because I slept in BIG TIME. I guess my body needed some extra rest since I am still sick. The dear husband said he tried waking me up so I wouldn’t miss yoga and I said “uh-uh” and rolled back over. Alas, I missed yoga but honestly, I’m not feeling up to much.

So, here is a quick recap of yesterday.

I got to work a little late but still had breakfast there instead of at home. I had a repeat of Thursday since it one of my new favoritebreakfasts. A bowl of fiber one shredded wheat mixed withQuaker Oat Squares and topped off with ground flax seed, dried blueberries and milk.

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T and I had decided earlier in the week that we would do a sushi run for lunch. I had been craving a sweet potato roll since the last time I had one. I ordered the veg maki combo which included a vegan roll (cukes and avocado), sweet potato roll and futo maki. I ended up not eating the futo maki because it tasted a little like windex (EW!!).

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T also gave me a few pieces of her kryptonite roll which was supah good.

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Shortly after lunch, I got this beautiful suprise from the dear husband. The card said “Happy Friday”, isn’t that sweet??

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Though my lunch really filled me up, it left me hungry on a couple of hours later. It didn’t have much protein at all so I’m sure that is why. I dipped into my greek yogurt and berries about an hour earlier than usual because I didn’t want to be hungry for my after work grocery adventure.

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I went to Trader Joe’s and Whole Foods when I left to stock up on some essentials. Once I was home, I baked a couple of butter bean burgers that I pulled from the freezer. We had them on a sandwich thin with ketchup and mustard, holy yum!

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On the side, we had steamed broccoli tossed with olive oil, garlic and sea kelp. I picked the sea kelp up from Whole Foods but am not sure if I like it enough. I am salt addict and it didn’t have that salt flavor that I love. It is packed with iodine so I think it may be best to use it in conjunction with sea salt.

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For dessert, I wanted to do a test run my “best fudge brownies” that I plan to make for Meghann’s  blogger bake sale to be held February 9th. I had to make sure my recipe wasn’t poison, of course :D.

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We had the brownies topped with a small scoop of coconut milk vanilla ice cream.

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This little dessert proved to NOT be poisonous at all 🙂 We went to bed shortly after because we are both sick and really just want to be better!!

Fews Words, Lots O’ Pictures

First, I want to give a shout out to a very special person in blogland, Lee, at For the Love of Peanut Butter! She is hosting a secret cupid blogger valentines day gift exchange. Be sure to pop on over there and sign up for the exchange, the deadline is TODAY!!!

I ate breakfast at home again yesterday because I went in late due to ice on the roads. I had a bowl of fiber one shredded wheat and quaker oat squares topped with dried blueberries, ground flax seed and milk. This is becoming my new favorite stand by breakfast. *Edited to add* There is no picture because it is on my other computer 😦

For some reason at lunch time, I was craving my afternoon snack so I went with it. I had greek yogurt topped with mixed berries. I added a few mixed nuts after the photo was taken.

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To be sure to get in my veg for the day, I had the chef make me a really big salad with oil and vinegar.

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I also had some sauteed spinach that was out for staff lunch.

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By mid afternoon, I was hungry again so I had a big ole orange to hold me over.

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The dear husband was kind enough to make his specialty for dinner since I worked two hours later than normal. Frozen Pizza :)!! This time we had the mediteranian vegetable, so good!

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After dinner, I had the last of my mini toblerones from Christmas time. I will miss these little guys.

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I was really stressed out because of work so after dinner we just talked and watched tv. Hopefully, I can get completely caught up today so that I can leave the stress behind. I’m sure part of it is because I haven’t exercised since Sunday due to being sick. I’m totally looking forward to sweating out some agression in yoga tomorrow!!

Beware: Long Post Ahead with TWO recipes!

Thanks for being patient with me yesterday, we had a really busy day and I knew I wouldn’t give Friday justice if I wrote about it yesterday.

Friday was a nice day, it started out with a cafe au lait on my way to work and then a breakfast wrap once I got there. I asked The Chef for something different that the egg sandwiches I had been eating and he came up with a great wrap. Inside the wrap was scrambled eggs, potatoes, green peppers and onions. There was also something really spicy inside but I couldn’t figure out what it was, maybe jalapenos. No matter what the spicy element was, it was delicious!

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For lunch, I had staff lunch again since it was vegetarian pizza. The pizza was topped with every veggie in the rainbow and I had a small salad on the side.

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Around 3, my stomach was rumbling again so I had a the coconut cream pie larabar. OMG. I loved this bar, I haven’t been a fan of coconut until recently and this little bar really packs a coconut punch. I really enjoyed it and plan to add it to normal bar rotation 🙂

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Last weekend, I  made a bag of dried butter beans and I knew I wanted to try my hand at making butter bean burgers. I googled it and low and behold I found my friend Jessy’s blog.  Jessy’s recipe is vegan and I didn’t have nutritional yeast on hand so I made some modifications. Here’s how it went:

Butter Bean Burgers

Makes 6 burgers

3 cups cooked butter beans (if using canned, should be about 2 cans drained and very well rinsed)

1 diced onion

1 diced red pepper

1 tbsp crushed garlic

olive oil for sauteing

2 tbsp minced jarred jalepenos

1 cup bread crumbs

1/4 cup Parmesan cheese

1 egg

garlic powder, onion powder, salt and pepper (all to taste)

In a medium saute pan on medium heat, saute onions and red pepper in olive oil until the onions are translucent and then set aside to cool slightly. Meanwhile, mash the beans with a potato masher until most of the beans are completely mashed, you do want to leave a few whole beans for texture. Add in the remaining ingredients and combine well with a wooden spoon. Form the mixture into six patties.

Once the patties are formed, you have a couple of choices. You can freeze them for later use or you can cook them right away. When you are ready to cook them, heat a little olive oil in a cast iron skillet (or regular if you don’t have cast iron) on medium low heat and cook the patties about 4 minutes on each side. If you cook them from frozen, it may take a little longer. You can also bake them in the oven for about 16-18 minutes at 350* if you prefer and oilless method.

The butter bean burgers were fabulous! I served them on Sandwich things with jack cheese, ketchup and mustard.

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On the side we had sweet potato fries, mmmm.

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For dessert, I had a TINY amount of Turtle Mountain coconut milk vanilla ice creamwith a nutella spoon. I would have had a larger portion but it was all we had left 😦 Let me tell you, people, this is GOOD stuff. I love it love it love it! If you don’t like coconut, you probably will not like it but if you do, you are in for a real treat.

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After dessert, off to bed I went. We had to wake up early to make it to yoga on time. Once we were up, I had a cafe au lait and a bowl of cereal. I had a mixture of Fiber One Shredded Wheats, Quaker Oatmeal Squares, ground flax seed and dried blueberries all topped with milk. This was a great bowl of cereal, since I had been in a rush all week, I was missing my morning bowl of cereal! I ended up not finishing the whole bowl but the dear husband was there to polish it off 🙂

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After last week’s yoga debacle, I received an email from the studio owner letting me know she was sorry for what happened and wanted to assure me that the class IS a vinyasa I and II class. She is also giving me a free class sometime soon, which is always good. I feel so much better now that I heard from her, I really didn’t want to leave my yoga home. 

This week’s class made up for last week’s, that is for sure! We started out with the breath of fire and continued to build heat from there. We did lots of sun salutations (yay!), a gorgeous standing flow that included warrior I, warrior II, triangle, side angle, moon warrior, standing splits into PIGEON!! Oh my, was it ever great. After the standing flow, we worked on arm balances and then she challenged us to give wheel a try. We warmed up with bridge and then gave it a go. I had only every tried wheel pose once before on a yogadownload and I couldn’t get myself up. This time, I could get up but I could not get my head off the floor. Rest assured, I will keep at it until I get it. We ended the class with shoulder stand. I noted during class that shoulder stand had just become a normal pose for me. Six months ago, I could not get myself into it. It is amazing what the body can do with practice!

After the powerful yoga class, I was ready to face the day. Even the dear husband, who normally prefers hatha, said he felt great and more awake after the class. This was unusual for him because he normally doesn’t “get” the mental affects (or should it be effects?) of yoga, he does yoga purely for the stretch. We were both on cloud nine as we went about our errands.

Once we were home, we had a quick lunch. I made Boca Spicy “chicken” patties on whole wheat english muffins with blue cheese dressing.

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On the side we had steamed green and yellow beans with “carrot balls”  tossed in olive oil, sea salt and garlic.

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And for an extra spicy kick, a hot and spicy pickle. I actually could not finish the pickle because it was just TOO spicy.

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For lunch dessert, I had two cherry cordial kisses. So good!

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After lunch, we cleaned the whole house, with the exception of the office. The only time the house gets cleaned these days is when we are having company 🙂 While we were scrubbing, I made caramel lattes to get us through.

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Once we were finished, I had a little food prep to take care of followed by girly maintenance. Our friends, Becky, Cris along with their two small children, Kristen and Reagan, arrived at six on the dot and we started dinner. I planned an easy dinner because I knew we would be busy, and since I am working to find balance in my life, easy was the way to go. I made baked salmon that I marinaded in fat free balsamic dressing

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And what I am calling cauliflower bake. The first time I had this, my friend Sarah made it and both the dear husband and I fell in love with it. After consulting with Sarah, I figured out how to make my own version.

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Cauliflower Bake

16 oz of cauliflower florets, I used frozen

1 package (8 wedges)  light laughing cow cheese

1/2 tbsp crushed garlic

1 tbsp minced onion

1 cup bread crumbs

1/2 cup Parmesan cheese

salt and pepper to taste

2 tbsp olive oil, divided

1 cup water

cooking spray, I use a misto with olive oil in it

Pre heat the oven to 350* and prepare a baking dish with cooking spray. In an large skillet, saute the cauliflower in 1 tbsp olive oil until it caramelizes slightly. Season with salt and pepper and then add water to the pan and cover. Cook until the cauliflower is completely cooked through, you can test it by mashing it with a fork, if it turns to mush, it is ready. Drain the cooked cauliflower and place into a mixing bowl. Add in the garlic, onion, cheese and salt and pepper. Mash with a fork until almost smooth.

In a separate bowl, mix bread crumbs, Parmesan cheese, a little salt and pepper and the remaining 1 tbsp olive oil. Mix well until you have a fine crumb mix, you may need to adjust the ratio depending on how dry your crumbs are.

Add the cauliflower mix to the prepared baking dish into a smooth layer. Top with the breadcrumb mixture and bake for about 15 or 20 minutes until the crumbs are golden brown.

We also had some kale the escaped the camera because it steamed up my lens and I was too impatient for it to cool down. The cauliflower seemed to be the star of the evening, well, if you exclude the wine.

During the evening, we drank wine

Our friend Cris opening a bottle of local wine

Our friend Cris opening a bottle of local wine

and nibbled on an impromptu cheese tray.

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It was a lovely night with friends and we can’t wait to do it again soon.

Red Herrings and a Mayonnaise Jar

Yesterday,  I woke up in a brighter mood than I had been in a few days. I had my usual cafe au lait on the way to work but because I was in a hurry, I ordered breakfast from the kitchen. The Chef made me a egg and cheese sandwich on wheat toast. I prefer to bring my breakfast and lunch to work but it is great to know that I have a food source only steps away 🙂

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For lunch, I had a bowl of black bean soup topped with cheese and sour cream. I pulled the soup out of the freezer and I think it gets better over time.

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In the late afternoon, I sipped on a soy latte that The Pro brought me. Lately, my need for coffee has increased and this latte could not have been more on time. Once work was done, I had an appt to get my hair cut and plans to meet the dear husband for dinner. We met at a Mexican place right by my hair salon so that I could get to group therapy in time. The food came out really slow and I was in an insane hurry so I didn’t take any photos but for the record, I had some chips and salsa (probably too many), a spinach burrito that was simply sauteed spinach in a tortilla and a cheese quesadilla.

The group is led by a therapist and a RD that specializes in eating disorders and this week, we met at the RD’s office instead of the therapist’s office. It is WAY on the other side of town and there was mucho traffic. I ended up being a little late but thankfully, I was not the last to arrive. We got started after everyone arrived and the discussion was about chapter 4 of Eating in the Light of the Moon by Dr. Annita Johnston.  The entire session seemed to be exactly what I needed.

First, we talked about eating disorders being the Red Herring , or a smoke screen, for the real issues. This wasn’t really news to me because I am very aware that my ED comes from my lack of coping skills for my past and present hurts. But as the conversation continued, we were given a list, an actual list, of about 200 emotions. The list is to help us identify what we are feeling which is the first step. How can we address our feelings if we don’t even know what they are? This is a situation that I find myself in often. Sure, I can identify happy, mad, sad, frustrated but isolated, not so much. Of course, I have felt isolated but never have I been able to put a word to the feeling. The feeling of not knowing “what’s wrong” often times leads to emotional eating and sometimes binging.

Once the emotion is identified, we have to take action that doesn’t lead to our “behavior”. When we are mad, we can go for a run or when we are happy we could dance or sing. So the question arises, what about those times that the ED takes over and logic is no longer available in our minds? That is where self care, or the mayonnaise jar , comes in. In order to prevent those moments when the cloak of ED covers us, we have to put our self care FIRST. That’s right, self care has to come first. 

For me, self care means spending QUALITY time with my dear husband, practicing yoga, meditating, regular (not excessive) exercise and social time. These things have to take priority over things like overtime at work, gourmet meals everyday and a sparkling clean home. Sure, those things are important to me but I have to take care of myself. I have often viewed self care as selfish but in reality, I can only take care of them less important things if I am well. Being at the bottom of a nutella jar is not well.

Another key aspect to self care is to not let our emotions pile up inside, we need to feel them and then let them go. I have trouble with expressing what I feel because I am a people pleaser. I fear hurting someone’s feelings or looking like an idiot for being too sensitive. What I learned last night is that being a sensitive person is part of being intutive, it means I listen to my emotions. I don’t have all of the skills I need to deal with them sometimes, but at least I am listening and that is a step in the right direction.

Do you put self care first? Are you a people pleaser that fears saying no or telling your REAL emotions?

Figuring It Out

Thanks to all of your for your sweet words on yesterday’s post. It means so much to me to have the support of such a wonderful community of bloggers. Working on recovery from ED is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to deal with with the exception of the loss of my brother. Probably because it encompasses so much. Not only do I have to deal with all of the things that have happened to me in my life, I have to learn to deal with everyday life, too. For so long, food has been my source for dealing and taking that away is a long hard process.

Yesterday was another long hard day but I seemed to making it through without using food. I made a cafe au lait for my ride to work and then had breakfast when I got there. It was another repeat but so good. I had greek yogurt topped with berries, granola and flax seed. The addition of the flax seed was wonderful, it gave it a nice nutty flavor.

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For lunch, I had staff lunch because I wasn’t really in the mood for what I brought and rarely does staff lunch fall into the pescatarian category. It was poached salmon with mashed potatoes

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and I got a salad on the side for some good green veg.

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The salmon was really delicious, it was perfectly cooked and seasoned. For lunch dessert, I had two small squares of dark orange chocolate. So good!

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For my afternoon snack, I had a nut and seed bar that I found on a recent trip to the grocer. It was pretty tasty, it wasn’t too sweet and the sunflower seed flavor really shined.

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After work, I had therapy. I was really looking forward to the session because I had been in such a funk I really wanted to talk it out. My therapist wanted to dig deeper than “I’m in intense therapy and it sucks” and after some reflection we realized that my most recent funk has many layers and is the result from the lack of balance I have in my life right now. The downward spiral seemed to start with my crappy yoga class on Saturday followed by a really long list of things to accomplish over the weekend. Yoga is vital to my well being and I am truly dependent on it for my sanity. Down time is also crucial to me and lately, I haven’t had much of that. I have been very on the go with errands, work, the gym and therapy. And last but not least, I need some friend time. Life has been so crazy, I have only spent time with friends for quick workout classes and haven’t gotten any good quality time to just hang out and have a good time.

Balance is what I need. I’ve decided that I really need to re-evaluate how I am spending my time and prioritze the things that are most important to keeping me healthy. Hopefully, over the next couple of weeks, I can get everything that I need to done while finding the time to just be. I think two major adjustments needs to be made to accomplish this. I need to make some adjustments to my workout schedule and I need to realize that now is not the time in my life for long complex meal processes. While cooking is a beautiful form of meditation for me when it becomes stressful like it has been, then it is time to rethink things. So be prepared for more quick and easy meals as I search for balance.

Speaking of quick and easy :), I made a quick and easy dinner after therapy. Grilled cheese on sandwich thins with Amy’s Low in Sodium Tomato Bisque soup.  This is a meal that I just don’t seem to be tiring of this winter.

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For dessert, I decided to test the waters with nutella. As most of you know by now, nutella is a major red light food for me. It is a food that I have tried “legalizing” in my life many times and have never really been successful. It always seems to trigger a binge for me. So, last night I had a small bowl of Stoneyfield Farms froyo with a nutella spoon on the side. No binging, no spoon directly moving from jar to mouth and no second thoughts about it. I just enjoyed it which is a major accomplishment for me.

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Thought Provoker: What creates balance in your life?