Thanks to all of your for your sweet words on yesterday’s post. It means so much to me to have the support of such a wonderful community of bloggers. Working on recovery from ED is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to deal with with the exception of the loss of my brother. Probably because it encompasses so much. Not only do I have to deal with all of the things that have happened to me in my life, I have to learn to deal with everyday life, too. For so long, food has been my source for dealing and taking that away is a long hard process.
Yesterday was another long hard day but I seemed to making it through without using food. I made a cafe au lait for my ride to work and then had breakfast when I got there. It was another repeat but so good. I had greek yogurt topped with berries, granola and flax seed. The addition of the flax seed was wonderful, it gave it a nice nutty flavor.
For lunch, I had staff lunch because I wasn’t really in the mood for what I brought and rarely does staff lunch fall into the pescatarian category. It was poached salmon with mashed potatoes
and I got a salad on the side for some good green veg.
The salmon was really delicious, it was perfectly cooked and seasoned. For lunch dessert, I had two small squares of dark orange chocolate. So good!
For my afternoon snack, I had a nut and seed bar that I found on a recent trip to the grocer. It was pretty tasty, it wasn’t too sweet and the sunflower seed flavor really shined.
After work, I had therapy. I was really looking forward to the session because I had been in such a funk I really wanted to talk it out. My therapist wanted to dig deeper than “I’m in intense therapy and it sucks” and after some reflection we realized that my most recent funk has many layers and is the result from the lack of balance I have in my life right now. The downward spiral seemed to start with my crappy yoga class on Saturday followed by a really long list of things to accomplish over the weekend. Yoga is vital to my well being and I am truly dependent on it for my sanity. Down time is also crucial to me and lately, I haven’t had much of that. I have been very on the go with errands, work, the gym and therapy. And last but not least, I need some friend time. Life has been so crazy, I have only spent time with friends for quick workout classes and haven’t gotten any good quality time to just hang out and have a good time.
Balance is what I need. I’ve decided that I really need to re-evaluate how I am spending my time and prioritze the things that are most important to keeping me healthy. Hopefully, over the next couple of weeks, I can get everything that I need to done while finding the time to just be. I think two major adjustments needs to be made to accomplish this. I need to make some adjustments to my workout schedule and I need to realize that now is not the time in my life for long complex meal processes. While cooking is a beautiful form of meditation for me when it becomes stressful like it has been, then it is time to rethink things. So be prepared for more quick and easy meals as I search for balance.
Speaking of quick and easy :), I made a quick and easy dinner after therapy. Grilled cheese on sandwich thins with Amy’s Low in Sodium Tomato Bisque soup. This is a meal that I just don’t seem to be tiring of this winter.
For dessert, I decided to test the waters with nutella. As most of you know by now, nutella is a major red light food for me. It is a food that I have tried “legalizing” in my life many times and have never really been successful. It always seems to trigger a binge for me. So, last night I had a small bowl of Stoneyfield Farms froyo with a nutella spoon on the side. No binging, no spoon directly moving from jar to mouth and no second thoughts about it. I just enjoyed it which is a major accomplishment for me.
Thought Provoker: What creates balance in your life?